Not So Fast!

Okay-well the title is what I really want to say today about Esaias being 1 month old. I have been trying to cope with this little milestone for several days. In fact, the only reason I am coping is kind of sitting at a level of denial. I can keep telling people he's 2 weeks old, but imagine the looks I'll get when he starts walking. I keep telling myself, I can't stop time, and I know that I can't keep him from growing or growing up. So somehow, I am going to just have to face it and love it! It's all part of the beauty of having children.

When Isaac was born I couldn't wait for him to get bigger. I wanted to see what he would become. I was so excited every time he reached a new phase or milestone. I think I even passed this on to him. Or maybe it's just being the oldest (I was so like this). Isaac can't wait to grow up. Even when he was 5 yrs. old he was talking about what life will be like for him when he is older. Of course then, he thought he would still live with me, and couldn't imagine the thought of wanting to get married. Well, that was short lived. Now he thinks about where he's going to live... without me. He's planning on far away...as in Alaska. He asks me if I will visit him. I suppose it's a good thing he still wants me to visit. I am sure the day will come when he will tell me not to visit. Needless to say, my oldest is technically closer to a graduation and a mission than his birth. Freaky to look at it like that huh? But I'll keep him at home while he'll let me.

When Marina was born, I felt differently. I was pretty sure this would be my last child. I remember looking at that tiny little girl and thinking, "How sweet, can we keep her this sweet forever?" Knowing the answer, and maybe having some insight/intuition to her personality, I did not want to wish her bigger any faster than it would naturally come. But, I was okay with her getting bigger at a normal pace. It helped that she stayed little physically. We held her all the time. I think she was being held or picked up well into her 4th year of life. When Danny and I were discussing this just a couple days ago, Danny informed me that she still requests to be held when he picks her up from gymnastics. I guess that's part of, and the perks of being a little girl.

Well that brings me to Esaias at 1 month old. Not only do I not want to wish him to grow up quickly; I am not okay with him growing at a normal pace either. I do wish I could slow things down. It is not helping that he is so tall, and seems to be growing as quickly as Isaac did. (Isaac doubled his birth weight within 6 weeks.) I know I can't starve Esaias, but I guess you know it's bad when... you've even thought it. So, I am writing this blog in effort to embrace all that comes with a growing new baby. I want to relish and remember every moment. It has been such an amazing journey to even be here with this little boy. And everyday I look at him, and breathe him in, I am so aware of this miracle! Here's to Mom being able to handle him growing up. Wish me luck!

Esaias' 3rd Bath but on 1 month, and he loved it!
Big Sister's 1st Feeding!

1st Trip to Great Grandma and Grandpa's